Away on Retreat

One of the facts of ministry these days is that most ministers get burned out at some stage. The Lilly Foundation website spends big bucks every year awarding sabbaticals to ministers. Some of my colleagues have had some great trips and it's really helped their ministry. However, a sabbatical only comes around every 5 to 7 years - and unfortunately, I burn out much more quickly than that!

It's been my custom at least once every three months to take two or three days and go away somewhere with a copy of the Revised Common Lectionary, a laptop, an adult beverage or two, and a good piece of fiction. My work in that two or three days is to do some intensive calendar work and to plan out sermons for the next three months - which, when everything's working as it should, means I've got six months of sermons planned at most times. This past year hasn't worked out like I would have liked it to for time out. Seems like everytime I've thought about getting away, something has happened. The place I've usually gone, the Jesuit Retreat House in Parma, OH (a wonderful place website ) has been booked the times I've been able to get away. Last April I was at Bethany College website in Bethany, WV for a conference. Bethany has an Alumni House where alums can stay for cheap. I'm not an alum, but I called and got a room.

The timing has been fascinating. Even though I'm not a Bethany alum - I wanted to be. When I was a senior in high school, almost 30 years ago, I talked my parents into bringing me to Bethany for a visit. It was much pricier than we could afford, but I wanted to come and look. My minister at the time tells me now that I was bought off with a new car -- but for whatever reason, I didn't come to Bethany. I went to Indiana University and dropped out after 3 semesters. So -- here I am at Bethany -- 30 years almost to the date of when I was first on this sacred ground for Disciples.

So much of my life is tied up in this place where I've spent so little time. It's the place where Alexander Campbell wrote The Millenial Harbinger - a foundational document for the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ). And while I try never to look back over my shoulder, it's been a time to imagine how different life could have been. I look at colleagues who are nearing the big 50 who followed the high school, college, seminary route and they're the seasoned veterans now serving as the leaders of the denomination. I took a different route, that I don't for a minute regret - but somehow, this place and time create all kinds of feelings and emotions I don't understand.
Maybe it's because so much has changed in this church I love over the last 30 years. Back in the late '70s we were a denomination on the cutting edge of most everything, or so it seemed. We had colleges that were consistently ranked as some of the best in the nation, our National Benevolent Association was just beginning an amazing growth, and while we weren't growing we were a group of churches that could consistently count on almost 2-million supporters and about half of them attending most Sundays. Jump ahead to the 2000's and we're a church that optimistically counts 750,000 members and a realistic count for most Sundays is around 150,000 to 200,000. The average church in the 1970's could afford a full-time minister and a secretary - today the average church has an attendance of 60. The NBA, once the darling of how we were growing and changing the world by caring for the least, has been through the largest bankruptcy of any non-profit in the United States and the new board is in litigation with the attorneys for the old board about what lousy advice we paid millions of dollars to receive. Back in the 70's when I was thinking of coming to Bethany, there were 1,000 students. This year's class of 890 is the largest since 1978. Bethany was the place where leaders of this church came to begin their work. This year there are 8 pre-ministerial students on campus. Due to budget cuts, there's no longer a director of church relations. The students running for the class officers have put restoration of that position as one of their campaign pledges. If only that could bring back the connection this church once felt to this place.
I've struggled with what makes this place and this time so special. Maybe it's the retreat time of working through all the things that have happened in the last year. Maybe it's being able to write sermons, and even this post, in the place where Alexander Campbell lived. But maybe it's because I'm back, for one more night, to a place where I never was but dreamed I could be. And maybe, just maybe, the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) can find such a place for our shared life. Seems like Bethany is a good place to start.